Being screen free with our children is a constant choice. Screens are a huge part of our society, they’re the reason you can read this very article. The choice to allow children to use screens in the home is the parent’s discretion, but I do believe as parents we should be thoughtful with how we use them.
In our home, we are not the screen police. We simply do not make screens a part of our daily schedule in our kid’s lives. At the age, my children are at they do not need to be on the computer for any reason in our home. My eldest son would only need the computer for school-related work. My children do not have any electronic devices and I have no intention of them having any unless it becomes necessary for schooling.
Do my kids sometimes get to watch a movie? Yes. Will they be allowed to play an age-appropriate video game at a friend’s house? Sure. My biggest desire is not for my kids to be against screens, it is for my children to know life without them. Here are some of my reasons for choosing screen free in our home.
Screen Free Promotes Creativity
Having my kids be screen free enhances their creativity. There are some very fun shows that have certain creative aspects. In fact, my eldest son loves to learn how to draw from a kids art youtube channel. However; I began to realize that though these shows can be fun for the kids and give them new ideas, their creativity was lessened.
For example with the art videos, my son was limited in what he thought he could draw. Instead of sitting down with pen and paper to think of what he wanted to draw he was scrolling through Youtube hoping something would stand out. He was confined to what Youtube told him he could draw, instead of what he truly desired to draw. Taking the screen out of the picture freed him to draw anything.
Screen Free Encourages Communication
Many people will tell you the best thing you can do is talk with your kids. Have you ever tried talking to a kid watching a tv show? Their eyes glazed over glued on the screen and they answer you without the slightest turn of the head. Screens do not promote communication.
The time that my children spend in front of a screen, is time that I do not have their attention. Trust me most times I don’t want their attention. I just want to go to the bathroom without hearing the handle jingle or someone (man or child) knocking on the door needing something. But the truth is my kids benefit so much when I have to pay attention to them.
Instead of plopping my children in front of the tv (which I got rid of, more about that in a future post), I am forced to turn their desire to talk and be entertained in a different direction. One great way is reading books. Books entertain, teach, and promote creativity.
When it comes to books the key is to find books you and your children enjoy. You will be more likely to read to your kids if you like the books you have around you. I hide books I do not like and then donate or trash them depending on their condition.
Being screen free gives my children more opportunities to communicate with me throughout the day.
Kids Learn to Entertain Themselves
If you have ever babysat a child who is used to constantly being entertained you know how exhausting it is. Being a mother is exhausting without the added need for constant entertainment, so this is a huge benefit of no screens. Screentime provides a type of entertainment that requires no effort of the child or the parent besides pushing a button.
Making our home a place where screen time is not incorporated into our daily routine promotes our children to learn to self-entertain. Instead of watching a show in the morning, my daughter can play magna-tiles or blocks if my husband and I sleep in. When my younger two are napping and my eldest wants to do something he can read a book or do a project that would be hard to do with two toddlers trying to get into everything.
When out and about it makes sense to want to put a screen right in front of the kids and keep them entertained. As much as I would love to walk through a store with perfectly quiet angels, my priority is to teach my children to have patience. I want my kids to have respect for others in the store, including their mother. Sometimes my children do wonderfully and other times I look like I am some sort of circus manager and that’s okay too. The main thing is I am providing my children with skills to self entertain and not relying on a device to keep them calm while out and about.
Screen Free Helps Me Be a Better Parent
Being screen free with my children helps me to be a better mother. Before I took away our tv I found myself trying to use television as a tool to distract my children. I would spend time setting up a show just to have my kids running back to me five minutes later. (probably because I would try to put on some old school Mr. Rogers Neighborhood instead of Baby Shark). My kids love baby shark… (pro tip: just hide the screen and dance with them).
I have more patience for my children when I do not have a quick fix. My parenting has to be more intentional. Daily tasks become a group effort and I bring my children into the work I am doing. Screen free helps me to be more attentive to my children and makes me a better parent.
Screen Free Prevents Subliminal Messages
The world we live in is corrupt. I am sure there are great shows out there. There are a lot of really terrible shows too. Kids are sponges and I want my children to form their worldview outside of the television. Learning to seek out knowledge and truth from books, conversations with people, and observation is far more valuable than just believing what they learned from the tv.
Screens have the power to teach children what to believe, they also encourage unhealthy habits like consumerism. As a “recovering” (i.e.: I’m working on it) emotional shopper, I want better for my children. Marketers should not be telling my kids what they need. Screen free helps me regulate what my children learn to be true of the world around them.
Screen Free Promotes Physical Activity
Physical activity is so important for children. Taking screens out of the picture provides a great opportunity to redirect energy to outdoor play. I find this especially helpful with my eldest child. My littles can still run around the house and get their energy out fairly easily indoors. However, my big boy can get a little more restless and I find sending him to ride his bike down our street is sometimes the perfect solution to his “boredom”. Plus he comes back with such a great attitude. Win win.
When my littles get restless, we can go play in the yard. Sometimes I muster the energy to go to the local park and they love that. Having to help my kids work through their restlessness helps me too. Sometimes I use that time to strap them into the stroller and have a walk to the grocery store to pick up something I need for dinner. So screen free helps me get some physical activity in too.
In Conclusion
Screens are a part of our society. It is inevitable that our children will come to know and use screens in their lives. Being a screen free parent can be challenging in a world that tells us we need to use screens. If you want to make the step towards taking screens out of your child’s daily routine, you can do it.
Transitioning from using screens to taking them away will be challenging. Seek out help. Talk to like-minded parents and get advice on how they entertain their children. If you don’t have routines with your children start making some to help frame your day. Think of other activities your kids know and love to fill up the day. Keep positive, know your reason for being screen free and remind yourself of it when you are feeling like giving up. Screen free or not, let’s encourage one another to be intentional with our parenting. This pregnant mama needs all the encouragement she can get.
Did you grow up with a lot of screen time?
What is your philosophy for screen time in your home?
If you do use screens with your children, what are some of the beneficial things you use them for?
Leave a comment below.
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Hey Hi ,I just read your article and i realised we both are on the same track.I am also Screen free parent.As you said it is challenging job because we have to entertain and engage our kid all the time.I believe on being actual than virtual..I really appreciate your tips and right now I have received some positive feedback for my decision too😊 As I believe screen free parenting helps to create an amazing connection and bond with our little one than any virtual thing !!It gives us chance to spend true qualitative time with our tiny starts 🌟
That’s awesome. I believe it too real world time together is so valuable. Thanks for commenting love to be able to encourage one another!
This is a thought-provoking and insightful article.
As a parent, I appreciate the perspective shared here. Our approach to screen time with our children is a constant consideration, and it’s reassuring to hear about your intentional and mindful approach.
The points you raised about promoting communication, regulating what children learn, and encouraging physical activity are particularly compelling.
Thank you for sharing your experiences and reasons for choosing to be screen-free with your kids. It’s a topic that resonates with many parents, and your insights are valuable.
ERIC MONTANA
Glad you enjoyed the post, blessings Eric!
How do you deal with kids feeling like they are missing out? Shows or games that other kids will be talking about? I really want to go screen free because I’ve noticed it makes him irritable and anxious, but that’s the one thing holding me back. Help please!
Hey there, personally I do not mind if my kids are missing out. If my kids hear about a show their friend likes or a game I will simply address them with understanding and firmness on what we do. When they become adults they will watch what they please but as they are still children I will be making those decisions for them and it’s not the end of the world there are so many wonderful screen free opportunities to explore. Feeling left out about tv shows and games are a short bit of time (unless that is all the kids around your children do) there is great opportunity for your child to speak up about talking about something else or playing something else and if the other children only want to obsess on a game maybe it’s time to look for friends who have similar interests to your children rather than just shows and games.
As for the anxiousness most children who have been accustomed to screen time, will have a sort of withdrawl period where your child will be struggling with out that “screen fix”. My only advice is to be proactive, know that you may have to be extra intentional with your kiddo during this season. It may be going for a walk to distract from the usual time they play a video game, or reading a book or two instead of watching a show.
Hope that helps!
Hi. I am 12 and trying to eliminate screen time by myself because I was finding it was all I did. And I only watch the channel (even though I’m nearly 13) on tv for under 5 year olds. Our kids channels in Australia don’t have any commercials and I am still entertained by these shows. Sadly, my parents don’t agree that we should have the tv off or stop using technology and keep turning them on while doing things, which is starting to annoy me.
Hi, that is very admirable of you to try to go screen free. It is super difficult if you do not have control of the tv but here are some tips that may work for you. Borrow some books you are interested in or think you could be interested in (from a library, friend, or your school), instead of watching tv purposely read a chapter of the book, if that book is boring try another. You could also consider other hobbies that would keep your mind and body busy and perfect a skill. Even offering to help with dinner is a great way to help out and keep yourself from zoning out. Screens are not the enemy and although it is annoying to have people in your house who do not have the same idea of what is best try to be kind and continue to work on yourself and they might come around to see your side!
I grew up with LOTS of screen time, and we totally agree…for the benefit of our children it is limited in our home! When we slack on this with our children we see how quickly their personalities change! It is addicting! They are never so fast to through a tantrum then after a few days of being on the screen and then a day of none. They even argue to play outside with too much T.V.! Ah!
We try to only use them when we need to (sick, very busy, ect) and we ditched our cable box! We use services like formed.org and pureflix.com or buy specific and shows movies so we know there are no commercials, language, ect. that would be harmful. My children are still young and we know this policy might adapt, but it works right now! Thanks for the great article! In Christ, Jenny
Yes, I like that approach I am thinking of investing in a disk holder and possibly having some family friendly movies for special occasions. Save us time and money so we know we have appropriate options. Thanks for sharing!
I grew up with the tv on constantly, and unlimited access to the desktop computer. Sadly, I think it contributed to my ADHD, and sedentary tendencies. As a mom now, I’m going the extreme opposite and try to limit tv as much as possible, and not give into the trend of buying a toddler a tablet. I know my kids will be much better off without these things. My biggest reason, however, is the fact that it’s getting harder and harder to find content that isn’t corrupt.
Yes I feel like I have attention issues as well. I did have a tv in my room once I was in middle school I believe. I did like that my parents made sure there was no tv on during dinner though. I feel the same way about the content as well and I think a lot of it is hidden too so itÊ»s hard to sort out. My go to if the kids are sick or something special is Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood, they have about 5 episodes free online on a rotation.
Great post! I tried to avoid screen time as much as possible when my daughter was little, and it’s true, her creativity and drawings are amazing!
They are capable of so much and so clever. Not always easy when they’re little, but I think worth it!
Soooo true! And so important. Thanks for sharing this!
Thanks for stopping by!
Great post! We grew up screen free and had great imaginations and were really creative! We’ve never had a tv since being married but we have allowed some extra screen time especially during the three lockdowns for our teen to connect with his friends.
That totally makes sense. I definitely am not anti screen I want my children to grow up to be able to use screens responsibly as they become adults. Glad it brought some normalcy to your kids during these lockdowns!
Great reminders. It’s crazy how drawn to the screen babies can be at such a young age. Thanks for the encouragement that it is possible!
It’s so much stimulation for them and us. I am so glad you found this encouraging!
I didn’t have a tv in my house growing up until I was about 13. I think it’s a great way to go.
That’s awesome I found we play more board games and read more books with my eldest I hope we can continue into their teen years too.